I have been attacked very heavily by Satan and his hordes. I kind of felt this would happen after the most recent Newsletter: Is gratitude your attitude part 1 and 2.
The devil wants to keep us away and far away from telling someone about our LORD and Saviour Jesus Christ. And if we are in our emotions, we can’t focus and think straight, so he hits us hard there. The devil hits us where it hurts and our mind goes crazy. We think things that might not even be true as if they were. Especially in prison where you can’t do anything about anything, so you have to surrender it to God. Which is the best of course, but it’s not easy at all.
So, I have been praying that He takes my weight, He knows what it is. I wrestle with Him over it; I fight it. But He knows best, “So LORD I pray that You take my burden Father. I’m tired.”
As I was sitting in a brother’s cell and having coffee with him, Jose, (the one we gave the Bible to) came in and saw my face. He almost always sees me with energy and joyfully doing the work of the LORD. He said what’s up, I said somethings at home. I admit I didn’t have energy to speak much, still don’t. But boy did the Holy Spirit take over, “like now Jonathan that you are out of the way, look and watch and speak the words I give you.” SO, for about 30 minutes I witnessed to Jose of how Jesus is the only way to salvation, because he said he didn’t know where he was to go when he died. So, I went through the Gospel message and how to be born again. Also using my life as an example, the Hot Chocolate story, also when I got saved and ran to tell Joe my brother. How always I have had a fire in me to tell others of Jesus, out of gratitude for what He has done for me. You see, when I write about something, it’s like Satan says, “Are you sure, Jonathan David you so called servant of the LORD, are you sure you are thankful in all things?”
So, I kept preaching to Jose and that I want him to get saved. He asked questions and the LORD answered. You see when I can’t remember half of what I say, that is when I know that it wasn’t preplanned, it was from the Holy Spirit in the moment. A power and urgency come over one and you can’t stop it, you just let it flow, that river of living Water, that Bread of life. I can see that when I am broken, torn apart, mentally and emotionally that is, that I am stronger. As the Apostle Paul says in 2 Corinthians 12:10-“Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m very sad right now, I am very hurt. I can’t share why at this time, as I need everyone to pray for me and my family. That’s all I will say about it. The LORD knows my hurt and pain and I am struggling to give it to Him. You see even the gifts of God can become heavy burdens that hold us down. Weights that we need to let go. In Hebrews 12:1 is saying-“Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,”
Sometimes we hold onto the gifts more than the Giver and we must let it go. He who gives, has the right to take away. We must trust the LORD, especially with what is closest to us. But it is like a hook on a fishline, tearing through one’s heart. “Have mercy on me Good Father, I have served You faithfully, I have given up all to serve Thee. Have mercy on this poor and contrite man”. In Isaiah 57:15, You Lord says-” For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.” Revive Your servant LORD!!!
Although Jose didn’t pray for salvation right there, he understood completely. And he is one step closer to being born again and today we have the victory and we smashed the devil in the face because when the Word of God goes forth, it does not come back void/empty.
Isaiah 55:11 says-” So shall My word be that goeth forth out of My mouth: it shall not return unto Me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.”
I don’t know about you but I get upset when I keep getting hit and hit not only daily but every minute of the day, a mental torment that will crush you. So I have to hit back, so I do. I say LORD take over and fight my battle, help me, help me, help me. For hours sometimes that is all I pray. I can’t muster anymore. But I don’t have to either, He knows my way, the LORD knows my way…
Keep praying for Jose, the LORD is working in him. I love you all my fellow brothers and sisters.
David
A Pilgrim prisoners journal
P.S. Please consider helping with the Supreme Court mailing. CLICK HERE for the letter Template.
Leave a Reply